The last of the college decisions have arrived, and I am left confused.
It's been disappointing. Not that I expected much from myself - I didn't - but seeing the types of people who got acceptances where I did not just makes me ask "What the HELL?"
I feel very very pessimistic and disillusioned. I can't summon the energy to do math homework. Lifting the pencil is impossible. Why in the world should I do this math assignment? Look at all the math assignments I've done over the past four years. They've all come to naught, apparently. They've done me no good. Why should I continue? Yes, I might get rescinded from what paltry few schools I even got into, but so what. I feel so miserable I don't even care.
What bugs me the most is that I could've just gone to any old school and gotten into UCLA. Why the heck did I go to Troy? My class rank SUCKS. Not being in full honors for the first two years because of that stupid Troy Tech test that I didn't even try on SUCKS. Being in the same classes as math geniuses made my grades SUCK.
I'm tired and weary and confused. Excuse my melodrama but why God?? Why in the WORLD?
I don't know where I'll go and I don't know what to do. I need help.
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